an announcement

via

thanks, Steve

Just trying to keep this in mind lately.

I am good.

I am worthy.

I am enough.



an invitation to battle

I think it's clear who won.

My Valentine

I know all the cool kids hate Valentine's Day, but I just can't deny my excitement every.single.year. I feel like my love affair with V-Day is pretty objective because before Jordan, I never had a beau to share in the festivities with. (That's what happens when you marry your first love.) 

I think any reason we're given to show love is certainly worth celebration. Sure, the romantic aspect is lovely and all, but spreading love everywhere makes me so happy and excited there's not even a word for it. Now that Jordan has come along, I have even more reasons to love the holiday for love. 

As I try to contain my giddiness this year, I can't help but reminisce over the last 4.5 years I've had with Jordan. I like to avoid the cheesiness and the cliches people fall into when talking about those they care about, but I never want anyone, including Jordan, to doubt my love and adoration for him. . . so sue me. I'm a little TMI on occasion.

*****
I met Jordan August 16, 2008. I was busy moving everything I owned into my shared room at Valley View Tower-- room 611, and trying to send an aura of confidence, maturity, and fun out to my new friends. And then . . .

There he was.

Now here's where to many, my story loses credit (but to everyone, it gets really gagorific):

I insistently knew the boy who's name I didn't even know yet would somehow change the course of my life, forever. I've never felt that feeling before, or since.

Because I hadn't ever experienced that, I didn't give those feelings much worth. I introduced myself as I had to a gagillion other people that day, and carried on.

As the day continued, I heard the girls whispering and giggling-- all declaring they would be the one to win thecutestboytheyhaveeverseen's love. I of course, would never follow the crowd. I also know better than to get between a girl and the future love of her life.*

After everyone got settled, a bunch of us started playing games. We were in the middle of Apples to Apples when Jordan came over. Soon after, my mom called. Jordan was sitting next to me, so I asked him to take my place while I went to talk. 

He gave me the death stare, and refused.

death stare

Awkward . . . 


I thought even the possibility of friendship was lost with this sir-cranks-a-lot. I was over it though. I don't fight for love or acceptance from those who don't want to offer it freely to me. The girls continued to swoon over him and I kept my distance. 

As the drama heightened between the crowds of females throwing themselves at him, and as I avoided getting in the middle of anything, we found friendship. I'd get him dates, and he'd come over in the early hours of the morning to tell me about them. We'd go to the basement to laugh and talk and sometimes just sit in silence. That was the perfection of our friendship. We had no expectations, and yet felt more satisfied with our time together than the time we spent with anyone else. 

By October, I had decided I was tired of seeing him go out with other girls, and he decided to fess up that he didn't want to be going on dates with anyone but me. . . 


*the operative word in this sentence being know. I know, now. Kinda caused a few issues back then. But it was all worth it. I get to come home to the kindest soul every day, and I don't want anything but that.

kindness counts

The Birthday Project is an awesome movement that I've waited a few years to be able to do. This year, I finally get to take part.

I'll be doing 22 acts of love; one for each year I've been alive. I'd love to invite anyone to join me in this project-- maybe as a little birthday present to me! ;)

Let's spread the love.

welcome

My name is Morgan and I'm a doormat.

That's what everyone at work tells me.

You see, working at an agency that deals with this population of people, and that is organized. . . in the way that it is . . . has really highlighted my personality traits.

There have been several circumstances lately with my superiors as well as clients that have my coworkers whispering in the halls "She is too nice. She needs to be more assertive. She will never make it around here if she doesn't become more calloused. BlahbibityblahblahBLAH."

People tell me my perspective on life will change over the years. And I certainly believe it will. But I hope not in the way that they're implying. 

I do not believe compassion and kindness equals stupidity. I don't believe finding the goodness in people and situations makes one inexperienced or naive. I believe choosing to find light in the darkest of places is the very definition of strength. 

The cynicism of those around me has only made me more bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. I've been the recipient of plenty of hateful and cruel behaviors, intended to make me feel less. I know how it feels, and I never want to do the same to others. I learned early in life that everyone you come across is fighting a silent battle. 

So wipe those shoes all over me.

Annnnd here are some pictures of my office because no one reads posts without pictures. It's a proven fact. And everyone wants to see where I spend my life, Monday through Friday, 8-5. I'm just sure of it.

Pretty classy joint, eh? 

13 is my lucky number

Last year I made some resolutions. It's time to report my results, and look forward to the new year.

1. You better bet your bottom I am now a college graduate! Graduation was May 5 (which I didn't attend), and I landed my first "big girl job" May 14. 
2. Refer to above; working for DCFS has certainly taught me a lot. I mean, a ton. Not only about my field, but myself. 
3. We are now residents of the SL,UT once again. I have to laugh a bit at these first few goals, because at the time I was so freaking excited for all the changes 2012 would bring me. Now, with so many responsibilities on my plate, I so miss my life a year ago. Full of fun, socializing, sleeping, little Logan . . . an overall much simpler life. When will I ever learn to enjoy the "now"?! 
4. Jordan and I definitely have more expenses at this point in our life, but I do feel a bit more financially stable. We've been able to build our credit, make big purchases, and pay down some debts. I've been really committed to saving a percentage of every pay check, and my new addiction is watching our savings account grow.
5. One of my favorite memories with Jordan to date was our California trip during spring break. Jordan was scared out of his little mind to take the Infiniti on a road trip, but we talk about how much fun we had during that trip at least once a month. Now that we have a new car, Jordan is especially insistent that we go on more road trips. And I'm not arguing!
6. I did read more, but still not as much as I would have liked. My to-read list is growing too, so I think this is a goal I'll carry on through 2013.
7 & 8. I've really worked on all my relationships; with that said, this is a goal that I don't feel has an end to. I want to always do and be better to those around me. The thing I am hardest on myself about is the way I treat others. I want to be kinder, I want to be softer. I want to be less judgmental, more giving. 
9. Gee whillikers, this is another one without a measurable outcome. Sometimes I feel pretty awesome about myself, and other days, I feel so little. I keep going though, and I think that's worth something . . . 
10. I hope those in my life never doubt my love for them. I am so lucky, and so grateful.

As far as 2013 goes, I'm simplifying my list. 

- Do something big that scares me. Something that doesn't feel like "Morgan."
- Finish 3 whole books. I know it sounds pathetic, but I have about 107 partially read books. I need to finish something!
- Get off soda. As was noted last March somewhere along the way in my relationship with Jordan, I picked up the ridiculous soda habit. I gotta kick it.
- Cook more, and be more inventive/adventurous in my cooking.

I really am giddy about this year. It definitely feels like 2013 will prove to be lucky.

homemade Christmas gifts 4.0 and 5.0

As I said before, I found a version of my mother-in-law's gift on Pinterest. She's difficult to shop for, so I thought this little wrapping center was adorable for the woman who has everything . . . 

I took some creative liberties to transform the idea into something a bit more personalized.

*** 

I drew Jordan's cousin Morgan this year. I started about 3 different projects before deciding I didn't like any of them. Morgan really wanted a free hamster on Black Friday this year, but she didn't get one. . . Until Christmas Eve!!

I decided to attempt crocheting for the first time, and made these little guys. (My dear Emily gave me crocheting lessons before I started. She's like. The best at everything in the world. Bless her.)

They got a bit excited when I put them in their cage, and pooped all over. Imagine that!

***

Overall, our homemade Christmas gifts have been a hit, and I'm glad to finally have the messes from all of our projects out of my apartment. I hope it was a very merry Christmas for all. I've already started the countdown for next year!

homemade Christmas gifts 3.0

Jordan drew his cousin Tanner for homemade gifts. Tanner is 17, and a boy-- so I think that pretty much sums up how hard it was to come up with anything for him. Jordan, in his infinite wisdom, came up with a tie holder! Tanner's preparing for a mission, so it seemed fitting.

homemade Christmas gifts 2.0

I drew my sister Bobbi for sibling gifts this year. While I struggled a lot to come up with anything, the biggest issue proved to be the $20 limit we have for making these gifts.

The only thing I could come up for Bobbi would be jewelry. She is fancy and feminine, and it packs in a suitcase easily so she doesn't have issues with the TSA when she flies back home to Arizona.

My project was brilliant-- or so I initially thought. Making earrings from scratch is definitely not the funnest time I've ever had. I thought I'd make a mold to start, so all my earrings would be the same shape and size. Short story: that idea did NOT work. Waste of time and money. Instead, I carefully dripped epoxy into circles on wax paper for hours. And ruined most of them. And ended up mostly with misshapen blobs. I just cover up the pain of this project with cliches like "it gives them character!" and "it's the thought that counts."

I used this resin kit. It was OK to work with, but I do wish it dried harder. That was probably a "user" issue, not a product one, though.

LOOK AT THE BEAUTIFUL GLITTER!! I was so excited to have an excuse to buy all that sparkle! I chose a color from each area of the color wheel, and combined the resin and glitter. As you'll see, not all of those actually worked. Boo. Once the blobs were dry, I attached earring posts with glue.

And here's the final product. Certainly not my best work, but considering the time, energy, and tears that went into them, I called it quits at this point. I used a piece of cardboard, poked holes though, and stuck the earrings in . . . Just like you see in stores, only with more "character."

A couple days later we were at a craft store, and saw embellishments that looked exactly like this. Only rounder. And cheaper. And cuter. Sooooo that was encouraging.